Been in a crap mood for a while now and am trying hard to figure out exactly why. I'm pretty sure there is only so much stand-offishness and staring into the distance that my girlfriend is willing to take.
I think that most of the crap mood comes from the second class citizen vibe I get from driving cab. That "servant" quality. Never bothered me when I drove cab before; of course, that was six years, a military enlistment, and a whole lot of experience ago. I guess I'm just tired of the automatic assumption that people make as soon as they get into the cab, or while they're waiting to be wheeled in.
I try to maintain a good attitude and smile and partake in the small talk, but the look of shock that I get when people find out that I'm starting school will never stop bugging me, nor will the conservative rambling (read: hate speak) of a couple of the old-time regulars, or the assumption that since I was nice and very helpful last time I drove you, that I respond to orders from anyone anymore.
I guess it's nonsense that a part time job should affect my whole perception, but it does. I think it's a coupling of that and the wait for school to start. A feeling of unproductiveness,
Not to mention outside events such as the war and the apparent lengths people will go to fulfil and provide for their own selfishness,
Not to mention the attitude that a major university can have when it comes to even KNOWING what the Montgomery GI Bill is,
Not to mention the student who couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that I was starting college at the ripe old age of twenty seven ("like, why even bother?")...
If you've read this far, my apologies; I'm just pissy. I'm sure next blog will be a little more entertaining.
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2 comments:
I understand. After several starts and stops, for various reasons, I finished my undergraduate degree at 35 and have just finished my first semester of graduate work at 37. In the meantime I worked retail, mostly in small towns, though in some cities as well. The general public sucks, even though there are gems in there as well. Hold on to them and ignore the rest. Truly. Though I know how hard that can be, too. I hope your girlfriend reads your blog.
BTW, I found your blog randomly via the "Next Blog" button and I've been enjoying it for a week now. Good stuff.
fyi, you've got a lot more staring-off-into-the-distance allowance than you've used up so far. stare away :)
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